if you had read my previous posts, you would know that we have had many tantrum episodes. which kid doesn't? whilst i have received lots of advice on how to deal with them, i think (?) i have found one that works for us!!!!!
the first time T had a major meltdown, i think i went into a meltdown too. i cried and wondered, where did my angel baby go?!
so i had done everything from scolding to gently hitting his bum to time outs to trying to explain things to him. but i have found this is working for us..whenever he has a tantrum, i'd cuddle him tight and when i feel his body go less rigid and he calms down, i kiss him and ask him, WHAT'S WRONG? and i evaluate his feelings for him. Did you feel angry? Did you feel scared? Did you feel nervous? Did you feel excited?
We started talking about his feelings when he was about 2 years 3months when his tantrums started big time.
Low and behold, lately, he asks for cuddles and asks me, WHAT'S WRONG, MUMMY? and I tell him, Nothing's wrong. How do you feel? And he tells me his feelings!!!! I don't know if he understands the full concept of how he feels just yet but he definitely knows what excited means..cuz when he gets a new toy or sees ice-cream, he says, I FEEL EXCITED! :)
So, yes we have tantrums still but i think I like this gentle approach. And he seems much calmer and I am much calmer too.
It works best for us.
For now.
yay! :)
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